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Carmen, get it

Carmen, get it

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Tag: food

April 27, 2018September 8, 2019 carmenangerer writing

Short Story: Ikram’s

‘A perfect California day’ the announcer says over the radio as we drive to the hospital. Outside, the sun is lemonade -yellow. Katie has her dark glasses on and growls about how hungry she is. ‘Fuck not eating for twelve hours’ she says. Later, she sits grumpily on the hospital bed. "I'd kill for a … Continue reading Short Story: Ikram’s

January 21, 2015July 13, 2017 carmenangerer comedy writing

Eating Phallic Food in Public

When I was 12 I had an experience that changed my life. I ate an icy pole on the tram. As I happily licked the delicious lemony goodness off a stick two elderly men sat opposite me with odd looks on their faces. I suddenly felt self-conscious. I looked at my icy pole and then … Continue reading Eating Phallic Food in Public

January 14, 2015July 13, 2017 carmenangerer comedy writing

Let them eat cake – Do it.

There is never a bad time for cake. Think about it. Whether you are at a funeral or have lost your job, a slice of sweet fluffy goodness always makes things better. When I first started working in an office I was shocked at how awkward most interactions are. In the hospitality industry your workmates … Continue reading Let them eat cake – Do it.

March 24, 2014July 21, 2017 carmenangerer comedy writing

The Real Meat Injection

While shopping for cat food in Coles I found the following product, Coles Complete Cuisine, Real Meat Injection.  It raised a few questions for me... 1. Why would I want to give my cat a Real Meat Injection? This sounds like the kind of offer one receives at a backpacker bar. 2. HIGH "PALATABILITY"- I'm pretty sure palatability isn't a … Continue reading The Real Meat Injection

March 21, 2013March 13, 2018 carmenangerer comedy writing

Pube Potatoes

Recently I travelled to India. On my last day, I decided that I was going take risks and be adventurous. I saw a man selling fried potatoes on the side of the road. Well, I decided. I'm definitely going to have some of those. They look delicious. I asked the gentleman above if he would … Continue reading Pube Potatoes

March 21, 2013July 21, 2017 carmenangerer comedy writing

Why we are all afraid of being forever alone

It's Friday night and I'm standing in the line at the Fish and Chip shop. It feels about 100 degrees and I am sweltering whilst waiting to order. I'm crowded in by families, couples getting up in each other's personal space and groups of friends gossiping about their week. I have a sweat moustache. Fish … Continue reading Why we are all afraid of being forever alone

January 29, 2013February 28, 2013 carmenangerer comedy writing

Travel and Vomit-A tale of Irony

I was preparing to fly to India and decided, last minute, to make myself a quick pasta. (So I'd be nice and full on the flight). I had been discussing my travel plans excitedly all week, laughing off the odd comment about food poisoning and people who return from overseas travel with weird parasites in … Continue reading Travel and Vomit-A tale of Irony

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